Home is _________

During my widely social-network-publicized endurance travel experience to the States, a friend in Italy posted to me, "I hope you make it home soon!" It took me a moment of thinking that she wanted us back in Sicily soon to realize that she actually meant she hoped we'd get a flight to the States in due time, the place that she thinks of as home.

Which got me thinking…where is home to me? "Where the heart is"? "Where the Navy sends you"? In the past for me, home has generally just referred to my home “base,” the place I longed to return to at the end of the day to relax, wherever that happened to be at the time. But I've been living in a hotel in Italy for 6 weeks; that certainly isn't home. Tennessee is where I'm from, but my parents' house hasn't been "home" for about five years. Then where is home? You would think that as the carrier of an American passport, "home" could at least be broadened to the inclusion of one entire country. So why, when in the US to visit family and  joyously celebrate the wedding of two friends, why do I find myself missing Sicily..?

Make no mistake, it is great to be in the States. I had to suppress the overwhelming desire to hug the first dear Southern soul who stood behind me in line and made idle chit chat. How comforting it was to understand someone else's vocal train of thought!

And, ah, how nice it is to be able to effortlessly decode a restaurant menu. To not be forced to sit in silence next to Dinosaur after we've both made our meal decisions because we're each mentally reciting over and over what we'll need to say to the server.

The space, oh the space! A Queen sized bed in our host's guest room, a shower within a bath tub instead of a cramped stall, room to move and stretch inside the cars and space to drive amongst other cars without cringing.

And of course there is the comfort of familiarity. I innately know what messages the road signs want to convey. I know which stores to enter for specific goods. I recognize the goods within stores, can be in and out with exactly what I need, no need for a phrase book or translator.

But I do miss Sicily. Somehow I actually miss Europe's lack of AC. I had unknowingly grown accustomed to the absence of climate shock when entering a chilly air conditioned building from the balmy outdoors.

I miss the wooden shutters on every door and window that virtually block out all daylight, allowing one to seamlessly sleep off the previous evening’s late-night transgressions well into the next day.

I miss espresso.

I certainly didn't see this coming, but I miss the challenge presented during everyday life. In Italy I had developed a love/hate relationship with mixed feelings of both trepidation and adventure, of not fully knowing what to expect, each time I embarked on an errand. That feeling, I did not expect to miss. The experience of being in the US and missing that challenge is like playing sports: there is an invisible line drawn when, after playing unorganized pick-up with friends, you advance to city leagues and then up to college teams. The higher ranks cause you to work so much harder and you long for the pressure-free days of running around with friends. But should you go back for a light game of pick-up, it no longer holds the old enjoyment. You know you should relax and relish the chillness, but all you can think is, "Well this is just too easy."

Friends, family, it is wonderful to see you. I'd missed the hugs and laughs and fun of old friends, people that know me well. I love catching up, hearing about what's going on in your lives and the happenings throughout this beloved land that holds so much of my heart. I eagerly look forward to seeing you all again. But perhaps next time we can embrace in Sicily - the home where the Navy has sent Dinosaur and I, my home “base” for now, the place I have grown accustomed to returning to at the end of the day, more than I had consciously acknowledged. You'll miss certain things about America while you're there, but I'm confident that we can find other things that you'll love, maybe even yearn for when you return home.