mi scusi: Found in Translation

Our Italian phrase book’s “menu decoder” did not prepare us for British pub fare written in Italian. Fortunately the phrase book did include such questions as, “What do you recommend?” and “What is your favorite dish?” so since we were lucky enough to be at a large table surrounded by new Italian friends, butchered phrases read from the book + pointing at the menu resulted in a delicious meal.

Perhaps you remember the “American-size Me” blog entry from April 25 about meals (and copious shots) at the Spaghetti House? Well, during one of our multiple dining experiences at said Spaghetti House, Dinosaur and I became friends with Bella and her boyfriend, Italian Male Model/Actor (IMMA). Bella studied English in school and can still communicate in English fairly well, but would like to improve; I want to improve my Italian. This fact, combined with Bella and IMMA’s overall cheer and likability, presented the idea to Bella and I to exchange numbers.

Being that I was too chicken to contact such a new friend, and having no idea what I would say to her or invite her to do, I was ecstatic when I first received a text from Bella. She texts me in English, probably because she knows that her English, no matter how limited, is waaay better than my Italian. Even so, deciphering her texts can be an amusing challenge.

(Sidebar: I would hate for Bella or anyone else reading this blog to think that I am in any way poking fun at Bella’s English. I love that she’s reached out to me, and we’ve made a pact that in three years when I have to leave, she will be speaking perfect English and I will be speaking perfect Italian. That being said, I’d like to share a recent text exchange so that you may get a truer feel for the amount of humor and humility that is involved in our friendship…

Bella: “Hi erin the 2 june is party we will be rachel horses. You thing it and say me tomorrow if you come with we. Ok? Good night kiss”

Me, in Italian…I think this is what I wrote but it was probably even more ridiculous: “Tomorrow [Dinosaur] will work but I like go!”

I think I misspelled the Italian word for “work,” and I haven’t heard back from Bella yet, so the poor girl’s probably been scratching her head and wondering how to reply all day.

Additionally, during one of Bella’s and my rare phone conversations, in which Italian and English are flung hap hazardously together in an attempt at mutual understanding, Bella had invited Dinosaur and I to go horseback riding. I had to decline unfortunately, because we had birthday plans for a friend the same evening. However, “someone riding a horse” is a common slide throughout Rosetta Stone, so I thought that was telling Bella in Italian that I would like to ride horses, even though I couldn’t go that particular time. When I later proudly recounted this conversation to a Sicilian girl that works at our hotel, she informed me, much to her amusement, that I had announced to Bella simply that “I like to ride.” I’m hoping Bella did not interpret this statement with the same euphemism as our hotel staff.)

But I digress. Bella recently invited Dinosaur and I to join her, IMMA, and a group of their friends for dinner at a British Brew Pub up the coast. Dinosaur and I spent most of the evening smiling and nodding, with the occasional response when someone realized that they knew how to ask something in English (usually “Where are you from?” or the like) and our occasional chatter when we realized the same of our Italian vocabulary, but the experience of it all was supremely unique and intriguing.

Armed with our trusty phrase book, and slowly but surely, a blossoming knowledge of the Italian language, Dinosaur and I look forward to strengthening ties with Bella and IMMA, as well as fostering relationships will other locals. I can only hope that one day a text of mine, in fractured Italian, will appear lovingly on an Italian friend’s blog.